I was handed the whole box of tissues as I walked into the specialist's reception today, the prospect of maybe having to decide between paying an unmanageably large amount of money or telling them to put him to sleep having reduced me to rubble. The part of my mind that was saying come on pull yourself together woman was also wondering what I'd be like if I was faced with a potentially terminal health situation involving an actual person, like say one of the kids. Even worse you'd think and yet I fail to see how that could be possible when I looked at how pathetically pathetic I was being. But I suppose the thing about sick people is you rarely have to face putting an end to suffering based on financial grounds because we have a public health system here. I am kicking myself for never having got Pet Insurance.
Anyway, while the [brisk and positive] specialist took Basil away for an examination, I successfully distracted myself by means of a Learn A Tap Routine Video on my ipod and was able to talk to the specialist when he returned without embarrassing myself or him. Tap dancing is always my best therapy. And when the specialist came back, it didn't sound too grim. Just complicated. If the weird blood problem sorts itself out and he doesn't require a risky transfusion, if there's no spinal or chest damage which is being assessed via x-ray now, if his colon isn't punctured and infecting his system and if he makes it through the weekend, then he could have fairly straightforward pelvic repair surgery on Monday and he'd be okay.
*edited to add: all clear on spinal and chest x-rays which is good news.
Waiting, waiting then.
I tell myself 2 things. One is the fact that cats can survive things that no other species, including humans, could. They are tough and resilient. The other thing is that Basil has guts. He dragged himself back home through the rain and the cold with a paralysed back half, using only his front paws, all the way to our window and called us. That is some spirit. Fight on, gorgeous boy.
For ANZAC Day this is so beautiful and tender
9 hours ago