Saturday, September 08, 2007

Boys are from Mars, Girls are from Venus.

Cherub and Next-door-girl continue to have the nicest little friendship. These two little curly-headed moppets are a real source of happiness for me as I watch them walk around our house together from game to game. I've never had to adjudicate any disagreements between them and they are so in tune with each other that they unconsciously imitate each other’s speech patterns.

I was watching them play recently and gained an insight into the different ways that girls and boys play. One of their favourite games at our house is this fold-down truck which when you collapse it flat reveals a mini road and industrial centre with miniature cars. Hours of fun. And it's not that Cherub has never anthropomorphised the cars, there have been frequent car conversations along the lines of "I'm going to go into my garage now etc". But when Next-door-girl plays with him, the cars all have to have names and relationships with each other [Venus] to enhance the play. And it seems that Cherub finds this slightly unnecessary [Mars] in that it interferes with the action.

Here's how it goes.

NDG's car : Daddy, daddy, will you take me for a ride?
Cherub's car : (in slightly grumpy tone) I'm not your daddy.
NDG's car : (not at all grumpy, problem-solving) Who are you then?
Cherub's car : (thinking he knows how to get out of this one) I'm Fixit.
NDG's car : (happily adapting herself to new circumstances) Fixit, Fixit, will you take me for a ride?
Cherub's car : (starting to lose track now) Who are you?
NDG's car : (still going with the flow) I'm Climber!
Cherub's car : (totally blocking now, why can't we just brrrm the cars?) No I can't. .... I have to take Cherub for a ride. (brrrrms off)

The sound of my laughter distracted them from playing on.


  1. beautiful! The rules are more important to the boys, and their role/rank within the rules. Girls are happy to make up the rules are they go along.

  2. Very Funny, I'd never really thought of that difference, seems really obvious though now.

  3. Oh that is so cute. They're adorable.

  4. LOL! Guys do relate to each other by doing things together rather than discussing, oh, emotions and relationships I guess. It seems the testosterone has already kicked in and the die has been cast.


  5. This is so true. When my girl child was wee, we mostly only had boy toys (because the boy child was first, yo). The boy would use his Legos to build walls and structures and things and then knock them down, and the girl would use them to build PEOPLE, usually families with a mommy and daddy and baby and whatnot, and then act out little scenarios with them.

    That's when I realized that boys and girls truly are fundamentally different from birth, and no one will ever convince me otherwise.

  6. My mother swears boys are genetically programmed to go "Brrrrrmmmmmm!" I notice the same thing with my two. J.T. is all about structure and Abby is content to bend the structure to her needs.... J.T. doesn't even like to guess what is going to happen next in a story. He always says: "Just read the book, Mom."

    And they are so precious playing together! Love the curls.

  7. I think boys genetically know how to make ALL sound effects, Brrrm in particular but also explosions and collisions.

    I agree about different from birth too. I remember the intense reaction Climber had as a baby to a toy car with moving wheels - love at first sight.

  8. This post made me smile! Having two girls I have NDG's comments times 2! EVERYONE has to have a name, a role, a place to go, a relationship to the other and a story all planned out - and then off they go. Everything in it's place, even mum's role, or it all falls apart and gets messy - and we CANNOT have messy ;-)

  9. Found it hard to get past that beautiful photo - has NDG got dark red hair ? it is gorgeous.
    I would agree with the genetically predisposed usually but Joe the weird can outgirl the girls when it comes to playing those games. However if Margot doesn't play then according to his rules tears will flow. So genetic predisposition will out in the end.

  10. really IS all innate then!

  11. I'm like Nutmeg...with two girls, we just get the NDG-side of the dialogue (over and over and over).

  12. I really enjoyed this post Stomper!

    I love listening to their conversations too.

    Bluemountainsmary, NDG hasn't really got red hair, but it has red in it, if that makes sense? She is -almost- a redhead.

  13. And they carry that lack of organisation all their lives.

    That is such a lovely photo!

  14. Think what a giggle they'll get when they're sixteen and read this!

  15. Awwww, so cute!

    And all those curls between the two of them!

  16. How cute! Not having boys around to provide me with that contrast, I thought all kids played relationship games with everything! My girls have a particular fondness for needing to be rescued then morphing into the rescuer ;)


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